How to survive a weekend in BA

How to survive staying at a party hostel in BA, and going out all night long, all weekend long:

1. Wake up and head upstairs to the hostel's bar, anytime between about 11pm and midnight. Get started on the drinks and the small talk.
2. Form a group, choose a club, and head out to said club anytime between about 2am and 3am (no earlier than this — the doors won't be open yet!).
3. Party in said club until anytime between 5am and 8am (optimally, leave between 6am and 7am).
4. Arrive back at your hostel, and sleep until about midday.
5. Hang around in the afternoon, maybe have a steak or two for lunch.
6. Go back to sleep at around 6pm or 7pm.
7. Repeat steps 1-6 until the weekend is through.